Raising kids

Successful behavior change occurs when children understand the benefits of positive behaviors, as well as the consequences of negative behaviors. Children want and need to know the “why”. They like to know that there is a reason behind their actions so that they do not believe they are being targeted or unjustly scrutinized. They are much more likely to participate in change if they know they will receive something in return.

Self-monitoring is a technique that utilizes record keeping. You and your child track positive behavior in journals, charts, or another form. The gold-star example explained above is a good example of this. Self-monitoring lets the child assess his or her progress and serves as an excellent motivational tool. When children can “see” their efforts, they have an increase in confidence, and are inspired to continue. Further, they will be inspired to make more changes. When children take an active role in monitoring their positive behaviors, and when parents praise them along the way, children get a sense of ownership of the change, as well as a feeling of being in control.